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Pliny Harris

Cabinet reshuffle

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At last, with the Brexit deadline day postponed, Theresa May focuses on the issues at home and undertakes a cabinet reshuffle.

In good time, the long-overdue news filters through that Chris Grayling has finally been removed from his position as Minister for Transport. A bigger story emerges later when, showing a rare flex of her muscles, May sacks the Home Secretary, Sajid Javid, following his thinly-veiled overtures for the Tory leadership.

But the story that truly rocks social media and Fleet Street alike, is the report that Chris Grayling has been given the Home Secretary job. A man universally seen as utterly incompetent now sits in one of the great offices of state. That morning's Times editorial interprets the news as a decisive, stateswomanlike decision of May's to ensure those closest to her need her more than she needs them, but most people are in sheer disbelief.

This disbelief reaches Theresa May herself when, as she walks into her first cabinet meeting after the reshuffle, she catches Chris Grayling in the seat next to her, brushing the mane of a pink My Little Pony toy. Without taking the time to clear her throat, she croaks, "Chris, what do you think you're doing?!"

Chris stops, glances up to her and replies, "I thought it was my job to create a horse style environment?"

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